Some Christmas Pictures

Here are some pictures form Christmas that I took with me new video camera! (Thank you Jake) I will upload some video when I figure out how! Just ignore me in the pictures! 

Thank you to all of our family and friends

I know we haven't posted in a very long time and now that the year is coming to an end I thought I should write about our last few months and how thankful I am for our amazing family and our church, without either I wouldn't have made it.  I have never been a talker about my emotions, and I think it drives Jake nuts, but I wanted everyone who thought or prayed for us to know how much it helped us. 

Most people are aware that our son was still born in September. It has been so hard to talk about or even believe sometimes, it can still feel like a dream. And I haven't even really been able to find words to explain the feelings until I heard a song by Hilary Weeks called Just let Me Cry. I found out it is written about a child named Devan that passed away. We named our son Devin so it hit an even stronger note for me. But the song is great for healing and remembering that this isn't going to stop hurting soon, and we will never forget, but we aren't alone and we will make it through. Just sometimes you have to cry.

Just Let Me Cry

I believe everything happens for a reason

We're not just tossed by the wind or left in the hands of fate

But sometimes life sends a storm that's unexpected

And  we're forced to face our deepest pain

When I feel the heartache begin to pull me under

I dig my heels in deep and I fight to keep my ground

Still at times the hurt inside grows stronger

And there's nothing I can do but let it out

Just let me cry

I know it hard to see

But the pain I feel 

Isn't going away today

Just let me cry

Till every tear has fallen

Don't ask when and don't ask why

Just let me cry

When I agreed that God could put this heart inside me

I understood that there would be a chance that it would break

But I know He knows exactly how I'm feeling

And I know in time He'll take the pain away

But For now

Chorus

I have felt joy the kind that makes my heart want to sing

And so my tears are not a surrender

I'll feel that way again

But for now

For this moment

Chorus

This song is a great song and I am so happy to have heard it. I also am so happy for my amazing Husband, there is no one on this earth I would rather be with and our miracle of a son. I can hardly remember life before them! And our second son, Devin, even though we never got to bring him home, he will always be with us.

I love you All,

Alicia